Survival of The Dead Review

Survival of the Dead Review

Reviewed by Nyquill of the Gutter

Ok I know I have been slacking but this is one of those movies that have been sitting in my download cue for like 3 months and I finally put it to work and watched it. Man I wished I would have watched this earlier to save myself from the ups and downs that is George Romero’s newest chapter in his Zombie lore. Survival of the Dead kind of picks up where the Diary was going; if that’s what you want to call it because I felt that movie was going nowhere. There was a scene in Diary of the Dead where the kids in the film crew were robbed by a group of soldiers and these soldiers (or what’s left of them) are the new stars of this latest entity of this still existing franchise. There is also a small island off of Delaware that has 2 old Irish families as its leaders (on some Hatfield and McCoy’s type stuff) that the residents have completely parted ways due to the issue that some want to try to keep the dead there and make them perform duties that would suit them (um slaves George? Seriously?). Then the rest of the island natives want to kill off all the dead and keep the virus out of their land. Of course the smartest decision (to kill all the zombies) gets cast aside and they exile the Captain O’Flynn from the island that he called home because they did not agree with his slaughter them first ask questions later tactics. This is a zombie world, and I don’t know about you but I would have been right on the boat with Flynn, I slaughter first that’s why I have over an 80% percent chance of surviving a zombie attack, but that’s for another time. Anyway, the soldiers are doing what they can do to survive and I’ll be honest with you for the first couple parts of this movie I had no problem. I thought it started off with a lot of potential it was way more aggressive in the first 10 minutes than the whole film of Diary, and yes the zombies were moving slow just like they were supposed too. One of the beautiful aspects of all prior to Land of and even Land of to some extent (though I will never agree with you guys that that is a good film) is that Romero always gave you enough of the characters in the film that you related to them. They became your neighbor, you police officer, your butcher at the deli, daughter etc. He always did a good job of making the common folk the hero and staying very political on his distrust and views on our government and military forces. In this film, just like diary the characters really don’t matter except for the O’Flynns and Muldoon who bring the movie to their home for the conclusion.

Now I know there were a lot of problems with this film as the soldiers found a way to get to the island through various hicks and a spotty internet reception. They also come upon an abandoned armored car that has over a million dollars in it. After some maneuvering around the last of the dead at a nearby dock, in which one of the soldiers swims to retrieve a ferry and decides to bite off the finger of the contaminated that is reaching for him under water (like we don’t know what happens from here) they make it to the island to find weird things going on. I know you hated the zombie on the horse but if you have been followings Romero’s films religiously (like most of you) then you would understand since Day of the Dead (my personal favorite) Romero has always been showing an evolution of the creatures. Whether it’s shooting guns, coming to the mall, or riding horses Romero has shown us that no matter how carnal and primal we as humans become familiarity is a trip we can’t get rid of in this narcissistic lifestyle we have created for ourselves. So let the dead zombie ride her horse and shut up. The only part of interest in this section of the film is when Muldoon has a theory that they could stop the dead from eating humans and have them eat others things like horses, pigs, you know all the things they ate when they were alive. It seems as if it’s a failed experiment and the clash between Flynn and the soldiers against Muldoon escalates to a magnitude where I swear there were guns fight scenes that had zombies walking right behind the shooters and not attacking? Then it just got out of hand with all the remaining zombies on the island getting set free and of course the over used and abused by Romero himself person on the grown being pulled apart by multiple zombies scene is there and by the conclusion of the film I start to wonder if this movie was supposed to be a comedy that fell flat.

I’m sorry folks but with all the fast zombie movies and virus quarantine type things out there unfortunately I don’t see any need for Romero to be in the genre anymore. He reinvented and put a stamp on it that no one will ever be able to take away from him. Seriously though George I think it’s time to call it a day. I’ll be a fan forever of you and your franchise but it’s time to step out of the zombie movies if you do anything else in horror. I know you can and I’ll be waiting and so will everyone else! Wait for this on Sci Fy 31 days of Halloween, it will be on there I promise!

5/10

The Crazies Review

The Crazies Review
Reviews by Nyquill of The Gutter Reviews

So I never have problems speaking my mind. Usually half way through the movie I’m already writing my review in my head. I usually try to apply any horror movies that I watch to my inner child. You see when you watch over 40 horror movies a week like I do (something is always playing I the background at my house even when company is over) you become somewhat numb to horror so I try to always put myself in a mind frame as a child when watching because then maybe I will be more frightened. Not Crazies though ladies and gentleman this is officially a grown folks movie.
First off this is not a zombie move or any rendition of a zombie movie (ala 28 days and wks later). You nee d to think more along the line of “The Mist” for this one, or if you want to give it any type of zombie complex think compare it to the Return of The Living Dead franchise. Why would I say that, even though this is not a zombie movie? One word people “Government!’ Yes this is one of those creepy lil movies about one of big brothers mess ups and how it hits the heartland. Iowa that it, boring fields and clean drinking water, or wait so we thought until a plane crashed with a bio weapon on board. I guess my hardest thing with writing this review is I want to compare it to the first one and break it down piece by piece, I’m not though. It’s not fair it’s a remake about an event that could happen anywhere in the world and the OG was made in a time when people still gave a hell about what the country was doing to them, there was no skype or imdb.com or American Idol. People used to still eat dinner together back then I mean come on. So forget the remake. Yeah it’s out there, go watch it you probably won’t like it cuz it’s to slow or too political and over your head. Well that’s what makes George Romero a genius and you not!
On to the next on: Radha Mitchell, Radha Mitchell, please stay in horror movies for the rest of your career. You are tall, fine, and I have never seen a woman with as many facial expressions as she does through scenes. She is not the best actor by far but I like her, always have and I think I always will. Tell me you didn’t want to save her in Silent Hill? Yes you did! And mister Go drug dealer, Scream 2 killer, and Nicolas Cage Gone in 60 Seconds chaser Timothy Olyphant is the one of the few actors that you always see in memorable movies (like any mentioned above) or very bad movies (like Hitman) and you wonder how this guy hasn’t ended up in TV yet. Word to the wise all actors in Hollywood needs this dude’s agent like asap. He plays the sheriff of our little town and Mitchell is his wife and town doctor. Everything seems to be going just peachy in Pierce County until one of the locals interrupts a high school baseball game with a shotgun. Thinking the guy is lit. Olyphant takes him down when the townie pulls the shotgun on him with intentions to take him out. Now they assumed it was because this guy used to be the town drunk but his wife and son claim he was 2 years sober. Thinking it was a relapse they wait for the autopsy to find out he was a sober as a Mormon teenager. So obviously something is wrong in town as more of the town folks become some what distant and catatonic from their families and love ones eventually becoming sick and turning on them like a rabid dog. No this is not Rec (or Quarantine for you amateurs) about some rabies getting people though similar this is more in the water and airborne. There is one particular gentleman that decided to kill his whole family and when the cops show up after he burns his house down he is cutting the grass! They lock him up and observe very strange behavior which then turns to very violent behavior by their prisoner. Now this is the part of the movie I had a problem with. The scene of the madman and his family was awesome and I wanted more. You would think in a small town with an out break they could show more interactions of the rest of the town folks and show more blood maybe some titties shower scene whatever blah blah, I’m a dreamer sorry, but they didn’t they moved straight to the army dudes taking over capturing, killing, testing and all on the residents of Pierce county. I got over it real quick thanks to the pitch fork scene. I’ll leave it at that and say that scene is worth the price of the admission. The movie has a natural progression after that which is ok except for it really becomes about Mitchell, Olyphant and his deputy played by Joe Anderson (Ruins dude that got his leg ate up). It’s funny that these 3 are walking away from government danger and black helicopters are in the sky and they blow everything they drive but can’t pick them off when they are walking?
So of course you find out that the government is not going to let anyone live through this to leak out the news about their screw up, so our heroes do everything they can to get away from the army boys and surviving crazies. Lessons to be learned from this movie, stay away from car washes in times of peril and don’t trust dudes that hunt in the off season. See the movie and you will see why. All in all I have to say that I enjoyed watching the movie , there was definitely some, “yeah right!” parts in there , but if there was not, like every other survival movie if you kill the main character in the first scene then you don’t have a movie dammit! Of course the scariest thing about the film is this shit can really happen. There is enough gore to keep you happy and the acting isn’t really that bad. I can say it’s a remake that I can live with because it’s dumbed down from the OG for you mortals and I’m ok with that. Just remember though, if you are laying in bed one night and you hear a plane crash, don’t always think terrorist first, cuz sometimes true terror comes from your own back yard. Now go see it and demand they pay Romero for this movie!
7/10

Quarantine Review

Quarantine Review

Reviewed by Nyquill of The Gutter

 

Shaky camera shaky camera is all I’ve been hearing for the past couple days. Finally I got to experience it for myself. I never saw the original film Rec, but I hear it was pretty damn good. Usually when an American company takes on a foreign film they go over board and focus more on big blockbuster effects then keeping the true nature of the story. One of the reasons I was anxious to see Quarantine was because when you think of the premise, a TV reporter follows local firefighters for the night and they go to an apartment building filled with zombies, really how far can you stray from that? The movie stars the sister of Dexter miss exorcism of Emily Rose herself Jennifer Carpenter, who I didn’t know is actually dating the guy that plays Dexter on the show. Anyway Eli Roth’s buddy Jay Hernandez is in the film, and he is one of the firefighters she is following and it just seems to be a routine call until they get there. Supposedly there is an old lady that screamed from her apartment and all the neighbors (rightfully so) are concerned. There is a lot of commotion at the building and when they get to the apartment the lady seems disoriented and foaming at the mouth. After repeated attempts to get information from her she attacks one of the police officers. Then all hell breaks loose as everyone freaks out and one by one tenants start showing signs of a sickness that’s looks very familiar. Lets just say if you ever find out you have it you get a bunch of shots to the stomach. The plot thickens, as it seems as if they have locked the doors from the outside and they are not letting anyone in or out. Not one time during the film was I worrying about character development or acting issues I think everyone did a great job in the film. The whole time you are watching the film you believe that you are the camera man which is far different from a movie like Cloverfield or Blair Witch that screams for you to tell them to put the damn camera down so we can see what the fuck is going on. Not to take anything away from 1-18-08 but these guys did a better job of making you feel like you are there. Let me tell you this, be lucky you were not because everything goes to shit once this bitten bodies decide to get up and come after you. Very entertaining and there is a scene that would make anyone jump out there seat. The gore is there, the jump scenes are there and since they can’t leave the building you know the body count is there. Movies like this are intense because it scares you that with the world we live in nowadays some of this shit may one day happened. Just make sure you live in a house instead of an apartment building! Go see it.

7/10